for the most sensitive among us the noise can be too much.

You're absolutely right. It's very difficult to think that you're treated better by complete strangers rather than this person who's supposed to love you unconditionally. But like they say, you can't choose your family but you can choose your friends and I'm grateful to have good friends and a really wonderful mother. She definitely has compensated for his loss. Thank you for your words though. I really, really appreciate it.